The IUSB Vision Weblog

The way to crush the middle class is to grind them between the millstones of taxation and inflation. – Vladimir Lenin

Going the Distance

Posted by iusbvision on October 9, 2006

Everyone knows a couple of the clichés of a great relationship: trust, communication, and honesty. For the longest time, I assumed if you had these three I already mentioned, everything would somehow fit into place. My dad constantly has reminded me since I was little and even today that “patience is a virtue”. It wasn’t until I began dating someone in the military that I understood patience doesn’t apply to a long line at the bank anymore.

Looking back, there are a few things I know I took for granted. The main two are him calling everyday or the fact I actually had the opportunity to see him when I wanted to.  Now that he is on the Coast and is property of the United States Government, I can’t see him everyday or even talk to him on a daily basis. What I do get is a week’s notice of when he is going to be on leave. Then I have to share him with his family and friends.

So quality time for us is spent in fragments from what could be a couple hours to maybe a few days along with the family and friends. I need to get into the habit of making the most of that time instead of complaining how he’s spending what seems like more time with everyone else rather than with me. You’ve got to figure out if this relationship is something you want to invest in and try to look at the big picture.

What I should be doing (easier said than done) is enjoying our time together—regardless of how much time we actually spend together. Not only does this make his time at home less stressful in making everyone happy, but also lets the two of us focus more on each other rather than arguing over something as trivial as what seems as his “poor time management” skills that he in real life has no control over.

When he is on leave, it should be like his vacation. I’m not saying you should be catering to him, but rather stay away from nagging and whining about unnecessary things that are out of his control and make the most of the time you two have. Gaining patience is a great way to cope with this difficult time in relationship. After all, he doesn’t really need to come home at all on leave. Would you want to give up 14 days of coastal sunshine for South Bend weather only to be tormented the whole time you were here?

Stacy Rummel
Writer

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